Guilty

I have now entered the ranks of the guilty ones. I could not bring myself to say no. I gave in. He knew I would and pressed it until I no longer even tried to fight. I have no one to blame but myself. And now, instead of being able to hold it inside like I had wanted, it has blown up before me. No jury would ever convict him when I was as stupid as I was. All I feel for myself now is hatred. Hatred at the monster I have become. I do not even desire his pain. I want only my blood. Not even to cut, but all of it. My desire to keep going...no longer exists. All that is left to me is a blood lust for my own life. For, without me in it, the world would have one less monster to ruin it. And, perhaps, that is for the best.